Winter Has Just Begun
I used to post much more often, but I used to be much more active. In the last year I rarely leave the apartment. I'm just getting old and fat. I'm not happy with this. If I can get us some skates, we're going to go ice skating this winter. My life pretty much consists of sitting in front of the computer, watching tv and reading. Every once in a while I'll do a little housework. I'm so out of shape, skating will probably hurt me.
There's still no progress in the murder investigation. There sure seems to be a lot more crime and violence here lately. Our local police are now under the microscope. Until that murder I felt totally safe here, now, not so much. This town just doesn't feel the same. I find myself looking at every male I see and thinking yeah he looks like a rape hound psycho killer hiding in plain sight. It's awful. This town is forever changed because of these crimes. I don't know if I'll ever feel safe again, even if an arrest is made.
So I stay home where I'm safe. I must admit I'm getting cabin fever. I'm ready for change. I've taken the first step, again. Getting off the narcotics. It didn't last long the last time I tried. I am more determined this time. I know now that I can't even take one pill, not even a half a pill. It has to be completely out of my system. I think the worst of the withdrawal is over with. It was a tough week. I'm starting to feel like my old self. When I get a full nights sleep I feel great when I wake up. I don't wake up wanting a pill. The cravings are still pretty bad at times, but it's mellowing out. I just have to remember that I got along fine without those pills before I started taking them.
Last Saturday night we went up to visit S. D wasn't there, she was off on a girls weekend. So I got to sit in the shop with the guys having a couple of drinks by the woodstove. I really needed to get out of the apartment bad lol.
We finally took the Christmas tree down yesterday. Little R did all the undecorating. Packing everything away was left for me to do. I promptly Freecycled the tree. I posted it and it was picked up within an hour. So now we have no choice but to get a new tree. Mr. Man said he was going to sneak in a real tree next Christmas. We'll see. We may not even be living here by then. It was supposed to be temporary when we moved in here. We still don't have window coverings because we weren't planning to stay. It's ok, we're on the top floor and there's no other buildings around, just houses. But last weekend I was looking at curtains while we were out shopping. I think I'm getting used to the place. I think we may stay a bit longer than planned, even though that ship has already sailed. I don't know, very undecided right now. The place is just starting to get organized. I hate the thought of packing everything up before we fully unpacked, moving and unpacking and trying to organize all over again. I think we're here for a while.
Another change I want to make is to get more active. I want to get out and do stuff on the weekends like we used to. Lately, our weekends are spent with Mr. Man sitting in front of the tv and me sitting in front of the computer, all weekend. He is so exhausted he doesn't want to do anything. But that is going to change. I can't stand it. So, the ice skating. Since we don't have skates yet (and I had a pair that I carried with me for years and years until I finally Freecycled them not long ago), maybe some darts tonight. Playing darts is much more active than sitting on the couch.
They say the third Monday in January is the most depressing day of the year. I didn't notice any difference. I wasn't any more or any less depressed than usual that day. But I can see how that might be true. And then you have the people who are already looking forward, counting the days even, to spring. I refuse to do that any more. I find the time passes much quicker if you're not counting the days. Winter has just begun.
Well that's it for now. I'm off to start my day. Even though it really started at 3:19 a.m. I don't know why but that's when I woke up today and I couldn't get back to sleep. So have a good day and a great weekend.
There's still no progress in the murder investigation. There sure seems to be a lot more crime and violence here lately. Our local police are now under the microscope. Until that murder I felt totally safe here, now, not so much. This town just doesn't feel the same. I find myself looking at every male I see and thinking yeah he looks like a rape hound psycho killer hiding in plain sight. It's awful. This town is forever changed because of these crimes. I don't know if I'll ever feel safe again, even if an arrest is made.
So I stay home where I'm safe. I must admit I'm getting cabin fever. I'm ready for change. I've taken the first step, again. Getting off the narcotics. It didn't last long the last time I tried. I am more determined this time. I know now that I can't even take one pill, not even a half a pill. It has to be completely out of my system. I think the worst of the withdrawal is over with. It was a tough week. I'm starting to feel like my old self. When I get a full nights sleep I feel great when I wake up. I don't wake up wanting a pill. The cravings are still pretty bad at times, but it's mellowing out. I just have to remember that I got along fine without those pills before I started taking them.
Last Saturday night we went up to visit S. D wasn't there, she was off on a girls weekend. So I got to sit in the shop with the guys having a couple of drinks by the woodstove. I really needed to get out of the apartment bad lol.
We finally took the Christmas tree down yesterday. Little R did all the undecorating. Packing everything away was left for me to do. I promptly Freecycled the tree. I posted it and it was picked up within an hour. So now we have no choice but to get a new tree. Mr. Man said he was going to sneak in a real tree next Christmas. We'll see. We may not even be living here by then. It was supposed to be temporary when we moved in here. We still don't have window coverings because we weren't planning to stay. It's ok, we're on the top floor and there's no other buildings around, just houses. But last weekend I was looking at curtains while we were out shopping. I think I'm getting used to the place. I think we may stay a bit longer than planned, even though that ship has already sailed. I don't know, very undecided right now. The place is just starting to get organized. I hate the thought of packing everything up before we fully unpacked, moving and unpacking and trying to organize all over again. I think we're here for a while.
Another change I want to make is to get more active. I want to get out and do stuff on the weekends like we used to. Lately, our weekends are spent with Mr. Man sitting in front of the tv and me sitting in front of the computer, all weekend. He is so exhausted he doesn't want to do anything. But that is going to change. I can't stand it. So, the ice skating. Since we don't have skates yet (and I had a pair that I carried with me for years and years until I finally Freecycled them not long ago), maybe some darts tonight. Playing darts is much more active than sitting on the couch.
They say the third Monday in January is the most depressing day of the year. I didn't notice any difference. I wasn't any more or any less depressed than usual that day. But I can see how that might be true. And then you have the people who are already looking forward, counting the days even, to spring. I refuse to do that any more. I find the time passes much quicker if you're not counting the days. Winter has just begun.
Well that's it for now. I'm off to start my day. Even though it really started at 3:19 a.m. I don't know why but that's when I woke up today and I couldn't get back to sleep. So have a good day and a great weekend.
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