The Last Entry On This Subject, I Promise
Unless something else happens, this should be the last entry I waste on this subject. The only way I can think of to describe how this has made me feel is, it's like finding out you were adopted, halfway through your life. To find out, or figure out, that someone isn't who you thought they were, is....altering. It has a deep effect. It's not that easy to just forget.
To have it happen twice, is twice as deep.
I mentioned the 2 ladies I have met, well obviously, I've met more than 2 people. It was just that those two are extraordinary. We have so much in common. When I look back there wasn't much in common with those folks. Anything common, was likely negative anyway. The world is chockfull of people. Why I ever clung onto those two for as long as I did, I'll never know. I can even recall pivotal moments when I should have said a big fat FUCK YOU to both of them. But I didn't. I feel so betrayed, because I am a trusting and loyal friend, and they completely took advantage of that, and took it for granted. Now I'm here thinking "What the hell was I thinking??"
I don't feel that way at all about the new people in my life. I'm a lot more skeptical now too. I've become much more aware. I am much more thoughtful in my judgements of people I meet. It's really not that hard to do, to see a persons true colours just through little things they may say. Something I find odd is how I could always do that with men, no problem. I knew when a man was no good for me. I could see when a man was just plain no good. But with women, it was different. I guess I kind of assumed they were all like me, LOL. Boy oh boy oh boy, was I wrong!
So now I am choosier about who I will or will not get close to or have in my life. Out of all the people I've met, lets say in the last 3 years, since moving here, I have only found two who are worthy of my time and attention.
I hope (more than you do) that this is the end of this crap. I am officially MOVING ON now. No more. Done. Finito.
I feel enlightened. There were signs, I just chose to ignore them. Never again. I feel like my life is just starting. A new beginning. Springtime in the Autumn of my life.
I've always believed what goes around comes around. Those two dogs are having their days now. That must be why one of them haunts me, via this blog, to take it all out on me. The other one apparently, according to her daughters blog, takes it out on her family. I'm glad I finally pushed them both away. Let them take their misery out on someone other than me.
Well, I think I'm done. I don't want to spend another moment of my life on this.
I've been painting today. It's getting there, almost done. I think I've really started something though. I want to just keep going until I do the whole house. It started out as a whim and has evolved into a home make-over. It's over-due if you ask me.
Speaking of over-due, made me think of books and reading. The book I am currently reading, and almost finished, is a Mary Higgins-Clark job. I've been at it for weeks. She is not my favourite author, I'm really struggling through this book. But I have to finish it. Hubby read a whole book in one day the other day! I had picked that one out of the pile, decided not to read it, left it on the headboard and that's where he found it. He said it was a very good book, and it's been so long since he's read a book he had forgotten how much he enjoys reading. I tend to only read when I go to bed at night and then it's only a few pages at a time because I fall asleep. That's why it can take me a month to read a single book. This one is so forgettable I can't even remember the title.
Ok, back to painting. Enjoy your afternoon.
To have it happen twice, is twice as deep.
I mentioned the 2 ladies I have met, well obviously, I've met more than 2 people. It was just that those two are extraordinary. We have so much in common. When I look back there wasn't much in common with those folks. Anything common, was likely negative anyway. The world is chockfull of people. Why I ever clung onto those two for as long as I did, I'll never know. I can even recall pivotal moments when I should have said a big fat FUCK YOU to both of them. But I didn't. I feel so betrayed, because I am a trusting and loyal friend, and they completely took advantage of that, and took it for granted. Now I'm here thinking "What the hell was I thinking??"
I don't feel that way at all about the new people in my life. I'm a lot more skeptical now too. I've become much more aware. I am much more thoughtful in my judgements of people I meet. It's really not that hard to do, to see a persons true colours just through little things they may say. Something I find odd is how I could always do that with men, no problem. I knew when a man was no good for me. I could see when a man was just plain no good. But with women, it was different. I guess I kind of assumed they were all like me, LOL. Boy oh boy oh boy, was I wrong!
So now I am choosier about who I will or will not get close to or have in my life. Out of all the people I've met, lets say in the last 3 years, since moving here, I have only found two who are worthy of my time and attention.
I hope (more than you do) that this is the end of this crap. I am officially MOVING ON now. No more. Done. Finito.
I feel enlightened. There were signs, I just chose to ignore them. Never again. I feel like my life is just starting. A new beginning. Springtime in the Autumn of my life.
I've always believed what goes around comes around. Those two dogs are having their days now. That must be why one of them haunts me, via this blog, to take it all out on me. The other one apparently, according to her daughters blog, takes it out on her family. I'm glad I finally pushed them both away. Let them take their misery out on someone other than me.
Well, I think I'm done. I don't want to spend another moment of my life on this.
I've been painting today. It's getting there, almost done. I think I've really started something though. I want to just keep going until I do the whole house. It started out as a whim and has evolved into a home make-over. It's over-due if you ask me.
Speaking of over-due, made me think of books and reading. The book I am currently reading, and almost finished, is a Mary Higgins-Clark job. I've been at it for weeks. She is not my favourite author, I'm really struggling through this book. But I have to finish it. Hubby read a whole book in one day the other day! I had picked that one out of the pile, decided not to read it, left it on the headboard and that's where he found it. He said it was a very good book, and it's been so long since he's read a book he had forgotten how much he enjoys reading. I tend to only read when I go to bed at night and then it's only a few pages at a time because I fall asleep. That's why it can take me a month to read a single book. This one is so forgettable I can't even remember the title.
Ok, back to painting. Enjoy your afternoon.
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