~Charlene's Web~

Sunshine, Laughter And Friends Are Always Welcome!

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Location: Ontario, Canada

I'm happily married to Mr. Man. We have 2 daughters, Big R and Little R. I'm a stay at home mom. We moved from the big city to the country, living a dream. I'm a collector and a packrat. I'd rather read a book than watch a movie. I battle depression. I love life, but that wasn't always the case. This is my journal.

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Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Very Disappointing

It's been an odd few days. Fathers Day was ok. We just hung out at home relaxing. We gave Mr. Man cards, no gifts since I never got the chance to go out shopping for him. The W Family came over to visit and we all ended up going out for dinner together. The Dads wanted Chinese buffet, so that's what we had. I hope everyone had a lovely day.

It's been extremely hot and humid, but dry, no rain. My grass was dying and flowers were wilting. I put the sprinkler out and then it rained the next day. We had torrential rain yesterday.

Yesterday was the mediation meeting for our lawsuit. We've been looking forward to this for years. It was very disappointing. It was a big fat waste of everyones time. The other side had no intention of settling our case. They made an insultingly low offer and said that was as high as they were prepared to go. So now the next step is a trial, with a jury. Unfortunately that won't likely take place until next spring. Optimistically, it could happen in the fall, but more than likely not until the spring. So we are pretty disappointed. And angry that they wasted everyones time. They could have done what they did over the phone. No need to drag everyone down to downtown Toronto. We were prepared to spend the whole day there, dickering. They had no intention of it. Very very disappointing. We were hoping for an end to this nightmare. Everyone involved was pretty shocked by the behaviour of the other side.

Mr. Man has been working at this new place. There are some good points but more bad points to this job. Once again our whole future is up in limbo. Its very depressing. I don't think I can stand another year of this.

Little R left for a 3 day school trip today. Her birthday is coming in a couple of weeks. She'll be turning 14. I am at a loss for what to do for her birthday. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. And now with the new financial issues, I don't know what we'll be able to afford to do.

I've been doing my best to pull myself up out of the funk I was in and now it's all coming back on me. I almost feel devastated. I'm confused. My life, my future is in limbo. I feel pretty helpless to do anything about it. With Mr. Man back to work, at a new place where we can't talk much during the day, and now Little R gone away for 3 days, I feel pretty lonely. Alone with my thoughts. Really missing all the little perks of his old job. Miss the constant contact with him while he's at work. Wondering how we're going to make it on the pay he gets now compared to what we were living on previously. Its scarey.

We had a meeting with our lawyer on Monday so after that we whipped down to visit my dad and drop off his Fathers Day card. He was looking well. Thats when he told me he was planning to come up here this coming Sunday for a visit. That means I have 3 days to whip this house into shape. It is not fit for company at this point. As much as I want to do it, I didn't do much today. It's sad.

My gardens are being neglected. That depresses me. We had a kid dig out around our firepit and it was a tough job. But he stuck with it and got it done. We'll be hiring him to rake up the grass clippings when I cut the grass too. But yeah, the yard is looking a little rough with the gardens all full of weeds.

Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for me. Have a good night.

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