Stalking, Imagined and Real

I don't know if I mentioned before that I have cataracts in my eyes. One eye is really bad and the other one is just starting. I've had it for many months now. My sight just got gradually worse until I couldn't see at all out of one eye. So I went to my doctor and he sent me to an Optician and he sent me somewhere else that I've had to wait two months for my appointment. That appointment is finally coming up next week. It is my understanding that when I go next week measurements will be taken and we will set up the date for surgery. Apparently this is very, very common surgery. Many people have it done with a local freezing. I'm going to ask to be put to sleep. Somehow I don't think I could sit still while they peel my eyeball like a grape, even with freezing. It's been a very unpleasant experience losing my sight. And of course I'm dreading the surgery. I'll be very happy when it is done and I can see again.

Also coming up next month is my birthday. I'll be 49!! 40 is the old age of youth, and 50 is the youth of old age. That's exactly how I feel about it. It falls on a Wednesday this year, so that sucks. Usually it's right around (Canadian) Thanksgiving, if not right on Thanksgiving, but this year it's after. We're thinking of going to a show at the Sound Academy on the 15th. Birthdays haven't been that big of a deal this year for some reason.

The other day I was reading Cathy's blog and in it she called me a stalker. She called me a stalker because I read her blog! I don't leave comments, I just read. She has a widget on there which tells her where her readers are from, and I guess I'm the only one from my town. I'm the one who started her blogging! I've been blogging for years and she has read it. I told her she should start a blog and she did. I've known her for 35 years or more. We're not friends any more and in my opinion she never was my friend. I like to read, I read tons of blogs. Why wouldn't I read one by someone I've known most of my life? This just shows her mentality. Unfortunately I know just what it's like to have a real stalker. I have one now. I won't go into detail other than to say it started on Facebook. This is a man I don't know. I'm in the process of collecting evidence and if he keeps it up I will be going to the police. I know he's delved into my life beyond Facebook, but just how far he's gone, I don't know. In light of recent events, ie the gruesome murder of a woman in my town, I'm taking this very seriously. So really Cathy, don't be such a knob. You know I'm an avid reader and you should be thankful anyone reads your drivel at all. And you should really check yourself before you go flinging such derogatory statements around. You're just lucky you didn't mention my name.

There are some things I wish I could unread. Because of this murder I've been reading the news again, which I hadn't done in years. I found the news just upset and depressed me, so I stopped reading it, for years. Now with this murder I want to know what's going on. I won't relax until someone is arrested for it. This led to also reading Facebook pages set up regarding the murdered woman, and other sites regarding unsolved murders and missing people. That's what I wish I could unread. The last thing I need right now is some idiot stalking me. It's a frightening world people.

Drama And Murder

My my how time flies. The weather was fantastic this summer. But the truth is I hardly left the apartment for the last half of the summer. I've gained so much weight that none of my clothes fit me. I don't want to go out walking around in ill fitting clothes. I've done nothing but sit around playing on the computer and watching tv. Oh but there's been plenty of drama. Little R moved back in a while back. I was happy to have her back here. But the drama started immediately and never let up. She just left again on Monday. Now we don't even know where she is. She just said "I'm moving out now, bye" and left. She did say she would come see me this afternoon, but I haven't heard from her yet. She's 17 and doesn't know what she wants. I think her boyfriend manipulates her. I had just gotten used to being an empty nester when she came back. Then it was chaos. Now I have to get used to her being gone again. I do hope she shows up today so I can at least maybe find out where she is staying. She went back to school and the school wouldn't take her! They told her she has to go to the alternative school and get 4 credits before they will let her attend. I'm not 100% sure but as far as I know she did go sign up at the alternative school. I just want her to be happy and healthy and have a good productive life.

I've really been on edge lately. There was all the drama with Little R of course. Then there was also a murder in our little town. That doesn't happen here very often. I'm pretty upset and paranoid about the whole thing. It happened fairly close to home. This town will never be the same. Until an arrest is made I'll be pretty freaked out. This has kept me in the apartment for the last month. I won't even go down to the laundry room by myself now. It's just disgusting that a woman isn't even safe in her own home any more.

We've been to visit T a couple of times. Met his new girlfriend. It sounds like we're going there for Thanksgiving. You know I got him that computer from Freecycle, it's been sitting on my diningroom table for months. So we were getting ready to take it to him, and when we turned it on, there was the blue screen of death. It had been working fine up until then. So much for that. I know he'll never go out and buy one. I guess we'll just get him another one, unless Mr. Man can fix this one. I want my table back. This whole apartment is more like a big storage closet than a home.

The doctor has sent Mr. Man to a pain clinic. The nearest one is in London. He is getting this treatment called infusion. It's quite new to Canada. Basically they inject you via IV with freezing, the same stuff the dentist uses. I guess it's supposed to freeze your nerves so you don't feel the pain. They are looking at alternative treatments so that maybe he won't have to take so many pain pills. He had his first infusion yesterday. He goes back again in 2 weeks and then monthly after that. I hope it works for him.

So my immediate goals are to turn this place into a home. We won't be leaving any time soon as I had hoped. To lose weight by Christmas. I don't want to be like this at the company Christmas party. And to get my confidence back to be able to leave the apartment without fear.

That's it, that's all. Until next time, peace.